Jaachi Writes

ABIA Umuahia is a malnourished widow, Aba flaunts her bad and dirty roads,  to the admiration of ndi uwa. But like a psychotic florist,  Ikpeazu creates many flower derangement instead of paving the roads and clearing the dirt. n'ogugu steeti niile di na ala Naijiria, Abia steeti kwesiri ibu ndi mbu mana anyi bu ndi ikpeazu anyi nwe ndi umbulari  ma nwekwa ndi aziza ya na ndi okuko mana anyi enweghi ndi mmadu biko, how long shall this continue? #Pengician #SSA Enjoyed reading?  Please leave a comment and share with friends. Thank you!  

THE TRIPOD EFFECT The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the surrogate father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be here soon" Half an hour later, just by chance a door- to-door baby photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.  "Good morning, madam. I've come to...." "Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut in. "Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good. I've made a speciality of babies"  "That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat"  After a moment, she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?"  "Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is fun too; you can really spread out!" "Bathtub, living room floo...

POEM 354: VANITY the most impious of thoughts flooded my mind  as I bowed the head to pray for you and I blame the chilly harmattan breeze that through my window panes, sneaked in when i made to say the grace the words below was what I said: strike me as you would a match, against the surfaces of your supple skin strike me, please, not once,  but many times, until we catch fire when I was done, with my refrain I swear I heard heaven chorus 'amen' the most impious of thoughts flooded my mind  as I bowed the head to pray for you and I I feel holy still because 'tis natural this vanity, to crave #365DaysOfPoetry #Pengician #SSA Enjoyed reading? Please leave a comment and share with friends. Thank you!   

POEM 346:  i am about to mock my ignorance it's okay if you cannot stifle the laugh i'd be better off, because i write. i'm unaware, isn't it the trend? about the working of a court, of scribbling porn, i was convicted, by the church, without the court by god, i swear, i meat no Ham 'twas a harmless play on words, 'you're exCUMmunicated' moaned the church, well, i dragged 'em to the court my counsel is a good lawyer, the prosecutor had a fiery temper, 'he's a sinner!' moaned Padre still 'i've not seen her!' i argued still there was a minor chaos, we stood erect, trading words, the church and i, not one would bulge the judge banged his gavel so hard, it tickled the giant church bell "udder, udder" he moaned aloud i whispered audibly to barrister Chris , "a wrap of akpu, egusi, kanda and a can of coke". i placed my order, because horngry nice judge, he knows the bard be broke #365DaysOfPoetry #Pengician   ...

POEM 341: FACEBOOK Blessed be Facebook, who goes around doing good. It may not make the lame to walk But it does make the dumb to talk. Now every opinionated fellow sit their sorry asses on a bed of stone log on to Facebook and let their fingers run mad here, there, everywhere, about this and that Blessed be Facebook, who goes around doing good. It might not share evenly, common sense, but it inspires me to write 365 poems Now everyone wants to be like me writing stuff about things subtly becoming addicted to pun eros gospel, the new Macedonian call Blessed be Facebook who goes around doing good. At this point, my muse left me, the next verse is yours to ink... #OPASFEDAS #365DaysOfPoetry #Pengician #SSA Enjoyed reading?  Please leave a comment and share with friends. Thank you!  

POEM 330: IF EVER I DANCE If ever, I find time and courage, to dance in public stare I'd dance artlessly, without particular grace or skill, but with reckless abandon and orgasmic enjoyment, oblivious of peering eyes, jeering peers, and lips in sneeriness Until that fateful day, when I shall mock my stiff bones, with the intention of silly merriness, proudly, I remain my best mirror dancer ever. this is not a poem call it whatever #365DaysOfPoetry #Pengician #SSA Enjoyed reading?  Please leave a comment and share with friends.  Thank you!  

POEM 316: JOHNNY Prelude: Life can be a challenge;  of that there is no doubt. But If we cannot laugh at ourselves, life will become a dull and stifling experience. We could ease up and laugh away the stress and hurt and all. Life is pretty hard, I know, but if we take a moment to stop and see the joke, we can change our entire day. Those that take life seriously, may see humor as an obstacle in our paths. But the truth is this: jokes are funny because they contain an ounce of truth about life that would not be able to be shown through any other medium, other than sarcasm, satire or comedy. This is not a poem, it's funny, for the sake of laughs, but the funniest part of all, is none of this is funny to me, it's reality, The Poem: Johnny Johnny 'Yes, Papa' Graduate now? 'Yes, Papa' Job in company? 'Yes, Papa' Too much work? 'Yes, Papa' Stress much? 'Yes, Papa' Family life fun? 'No, Papa' BP sugar? 'High, Papa' Yearly Bonus?...

POEM 259: ROSES & VIOLETS Roses are red Violets are blue Honey is sweetness and so are you But the roses are wilted and the violets dead. Honey's lost its sweetness just like your lack of sense. #365DaysOfPoetry #Pengician #SSA Enjoyed reading? Commenting is now easy. Please help my blog grow by leaving a comment and sharing with friends. Thank you!

POEM 249: PINE APPLE He smiled A pineapple in his hand. He chewed and in pain pined contained in his pineapple were spiky leaves of a pine masked in the alluring skin of an apple #Pengician #SSA Enjoyed reading? Commenting is now easy.  I introduced Facebook Comment feature. Please help my blog grow by leaving a comment and sharing with friends. Thank you!

POEM 165: HERE'S TO THE BEER BARD Here is to the bear bard whose favorite quote is my third line; “Beer is the proof God meant man to be happy.” So for muse's sake, a mug of acidic beverage he'd take, to feel just a little more alive and pen more poetic lines ink spilling  sweat distilling  beer sipping life's too hard, too much to bear so he takes comfort in poetry and beer. - Stefn Sylvester Anaytonwu #365DaysOfPoetry #Pengician #SSA Enjoyed reading? Please help my blog grow by leaving a comment and sharing with friends.  Thank you!

POEM 82: GOD'S A HUMORIST What if a blue boy knew that the grumbling sky and gloomy clouds were out to beat him black cum blue? God sneezed Clouds gathered around His nostrils singing hallelujah, the Lord 'rains'. Thunderclaps  lightning splashed ...but blue boy sauntered on middle finger in the air. And down came the rain blue boy's limbs learn to race. I imagine God grinning whilst I ran like a headless chicken seeking shelter from torrential furry. #365DaysOfPoetry #Pengician #SSA Please leave a comment below on the comment box.

POEM 69: ARS GRATIA ARTIS Ars longa, vita brevis as short as this piece of poetry. This poem is wordless as the flight of birds. This poem is dumb like a sex doll. This poem is mute like a dumb's flute. This poem is dry like the tears in your eye. This poem is me introducing me to me. This poem is you looking through you. This poem is us messing with words. This poem is funny and I bet you're laughing. This poem is life relish it while it lasts. This poem ends here an evidence that we were here. Glossary:  Ars longa, vita brevis (Latin) - Art is long, life is  short. Ars gratia artis (Latin) - Art for art's sake.

POEM 65: CLOWN There's a stool in the my room I call it throne. There's a boy on the throne I call him man. There's a hat on the man I call it crown. There's a boy on the seat in the middle of my room A hat on his head uneasy it sits on his head, He wraps failure in purple smiles He love toys Most of them, cars. There's a king in my countryside I call him clown. # 365DaysOfPoetry #Pengician #SSA

RnB soul pianist and singer Alicia Keys song “We Are Here” is a unifying anthem addressing all the negative happenings in the world right now, from Baghdad, to Gaza, to Israel, to Nigeria, to the Chinatowns and Harlems of planet earth. Alicia's inspiration for “We Are Here” came from a simple question someone put forth.  The day she wrote this song, she was sitting in a circle of people of all ages and they were asked,  ‘Why are you here? Why am I here??’ This really hit her on a deep level. She realized no one had ever asked her that question before. Have such question ever came to you? Why are you here?  To kill and maim? To graze heads instead of herds? To deceive and connive to defraud the masses? To spew generational hate? Or to love? No matter where we come from, when we see the state of the world today, we can all feel the growing frustration and desire to make a difference. And we all have a voice—we just need to know how to make it heard. When Aba was on fire som...

A rat o compatriots Nigeria is no bae Tis not my papa's land This love and strength have failed Which labour? Bro, which heroes past? My brethren na in vain! Nation swap form is out Go grab a copy right now Late entry no dey #Pengician #SSA