Nobody Knows The Real Me

Nobody knows how many times

I've sat in my room and cried out my eyes.

How many times I've lost hope

and contemplated suicide.

Nobody knows... Nobody knows how many times

I've been let down, delayed, betrayed,

bereaved, disappointed, hurt...rejected,

tagged a clown.

Nobody knows how many times

I've had to hold back teas,

how many times I've felt like

I'm about to snap but didn't,

just for the sake of the few

that cherish a bit of me like desert to dew.

Nobody knows the thoughts

that have gone through my head

whenever I'm sad,

and how horrible they really are.

Nobody knows my pain

and how tears I rain

in the dead of the night.

Nobody knows

that behind the smiles

that masks my face

is a deep groan

a broken heart

a sad man

a solitary sage.

Nobody knows the real me

been beaten down, battered and bitter

yet stays in the light.

Nobody knows the real me

that holds on to hope

though I lose grip

of the joy I once know.

Nobody knows

Do you?

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