Soliloquy | Stefn Sylvester Anyatonwu

POEM 167: SOLILOQUY

So much smoke got my mind cloudy,

stripping me of solitary bliss

just like tense situations keep my persona rowdy,

no random pick,

no love nor quickie,

an interlude of cacophony

many a voices, no melody.

I stand aloof,

like a lonely wolf

dealing with the fake smiles

that adorn my clouded mind.

And, like bastards, thoughts run to and fro

the empty street of my mind

searching for crumbs left on the footprints

of fathers they never knew.

Sunshine smiling down in happy fury,

burning out their boy skin

into wrinkles that will testify

of lonely nights,

on they ran, thoughts on my mind,

until it dawned on me,

sunset rose from the dark.

So, this me learnt to live on words

borne out of solitary nights,

when behind candle lights,

I sit soliloquizing that life goes on with or with out me.

I sit soliloquizing about how

trust

lost the 'T' to become rust.

I sit soliloquizing how I've been flaked on

and stabbed in the back too much

by trembling hands I made strong.

I sit soliloquizing

why you'll got blades ready

to slit throats that refuse to chant

'Allah's great!'

I sit soliloquizing why

mother, sister, lover,

everybody get laid

for a few bucks,

and another boy,

like me, again, made.

I sit soliloquizing

why doth young lads flee north,

through uncharted desert lands

for lawns, illusionary, greener,

rather than dust weary butts,

shake off the dust,

and peel off the 'buts'

that limit dreams borne out of naught.

Alas! Even dreams shy away from focus.

I sit soliloquizing,

When shall I step out of the imaginary

and step into some real fantasy?

I sit soliloquizing,

when shall these faces sad and long

burst out in songs

that bring not sad tears

but drop off ducts that quake in happiness?

I sit soliloquizing:

What's right?

Who's wrong?

What's to write

to right this wrong?

I don't know.

I'm just a boy in soliloquy.

#365DaysOfPoetry

#Pengician

#SSA

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